What is Wise Mind? Why is it Useful?
Key Takeaways
- The term "Wise Mind" Comes from Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT)
- There are 3 states of mind: Rational Mind, Emotion Mind, and Wise Mind
- Wise Mind is seeing the value in both logic and emotion
What is Wise Mind?
Wise Mind is the practice of holding both emotion and reason in the same place
Emotion Mind
Emotion Mind is one of the three states of mind. It can be described as “hot”. It is driven by emotions and feelings, and is often accompanied by physical sensations (increased heart rate, muscles tightening, clenched jaw, etc.)
It can be impulsive and doesn’t care about logic and reason
How can it be helpful?
Emotions give us information about the world and prepare us for action.
A common misconception is that we should never make decisions based on emotions. However, there are some instances in which acting on emotions is totally appropriate.
For example, if you were walking across the street and about to be hit by an oncoming car, emotion mind would alert you that you were in danger and would help you get out of the way quickly.
In this example, we don’t need logic and reason in order to act. In fact, if we had to stop and think about what to do in this situation, we could end up seriously injured. In this situation, emotion mind is what was needed.
How can it be harmful?
On the other hand, there are some situations where making an emotional decision could be harmful.
For example, let’s say that you need to complete a project for work. Earlier that day you got into an argument with your friend, and you were still dealing with the emotions from it. You’re feeling angry and upset and don’t feel like getting the project done. However, the deadline is tomorrow and not having the project completed could cost you your job.
In this case, acting on your emotions wouldn’t be the most effective choice. We would have to prioritize making a reasonable choice and do what is needed in the situation.
Rational Mind
Rational Mind is another state of mind. Rational mind is "cool", task-oriented, and based on logic and reason. It can be cold and doesn't care about emotions.
How can it be helpful?
Rational mind is task-oriented, so it can help us when we have things that we need to accomplish. We use rational mind when we are planning, organizing, problem solving, and pursuing long-term goals.
How can it be harmful?
There are also times when logic and reasoning may not be what is needed in certain situations.
For instance, maintaining relationships with others often requires us to be mindful of others' emotions and to validate their experiences. If we're only concerned with being logical, we may come off as cold and insensitive.
This may prevent us from having meaningful connections with others.
Wise Mind
Wise Mind helps us find balance between logic and emotion. We can access wise mind by being mindful of the value of both feelings and reason. It can help us to make good decisions and also respect our own emotions and the emotions of others.
Practical Application
Let's say that a friend comes to you for relationship advice. You know that her relationship with her boyfriend has been rocky. They sometimes get into hearted arguments, they've broken up and gotten back together before, and now they're thinking about ending the relationship for good. However, your friend is willing to make the relationship work and is wanting to try and figure things out with him. They've been dating for 2 years.
Logically, you think that the relationship isn't going to last and that she might as well break up with him right now and cut her losses.
However, you also recognize the emotional impact that a breakup would have on her right now.
You decide to validate her feelings and also explain how you could see how ending the relationship might be what's best. You also tell her that you can see that this relationship means a lot to her, and that you trust her judgment to make the best decision.
By approaching this dialectically using wise mind, you can encourage your friend to make a logical decision while also being mindful of her feelings. This helps you to maintain your relationship with her.
For Further Reading
What Exactly is "Wise Mind" in DBT?